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Dave Taylor and The Drapes: Taylor-made for Rock

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Rockin Dave’s Criminal Record – Key Crimes

Rockin Dave, the accused, appears before you, charged with becoming involved in a photo-shoot on the street. He could not find the right key and broke into song, hit all time high trumpet, slapped low down bass, and struck Bobby on the drum beat. The accused was collared by other gangs who asked him to sing, but he stuck to his guns.

Tuxedo Injunction was obtained by the accused on the day of the hearing. He was bailed to appear before an audience, charged with his full criminal record, to which there have been many key witnesses around the world at the various stages of his criminal career, including a flat major, who flew an air force plane at the speed of sound. The accused attempted escape by parachute, resulting in the action being suspended.

The accused was sentenced by the jukebox jury behind 12 bars for the rest of his life. One day, while hammering on the jailhouse rockpile in the same ol’ way, he struck a dischord and ran into a sharp minor who, after being flattened, was accordingly recommended for release. Police fear that more similar offences may be committed by the accused with intent on a forthcoming prison camping holiday, and that his criminal record will be extended.

The accused has been released to commit again after all charges were dropped, due to explosive public demand, as a result of Miss Triell, A key witness, refusing to testify. For the record, the accused has made notes of the whereabouts of all major key witnesses, and will release them to the press in the near future.

2012 © Stella Silver