Why Philippine girls and westerners never get on

Relationships between foreigners and prostitutes rarely reach a satisfactory conclusion by Western standards. There is always a level of mistrust, based on the fact that the girl is an active prostitute when they meet and the fact that their initial sexual encounter is, almost without exception, paid for. The foreigner is thus never sure of whether the girl loves him, or his money, and while this is not a problem from the girl's cultural perspective, it is not something that the man can accept from his Western viewpoint. The foreigner who does take a bargirl as a regular partner, to the extent of living with, or even marrying, her, often fears that she will return to a life of prostitution. This remains a constant source of unease. The girl, too, remains in a state of jealous tension. She knows that she met her foreigner protector in a bar and she is all too well aware how easy it would be for him to visit another establishment and meet a younger and prettier girl. The combination of mutual suspicion and mistrust, coupled with unending requests for money to support the girl's family, leads more often than not to arguments and the break-up of the relationship.

In an attempt to distance the girl from her previous life as a prostitute, a foreigner might decide to take the girl back to his own country. The radical change in the girl's environment almost always results in unhappiness and the eventual dissolution of the relationship. Unless she has traveled she will be ignorant of the man's country and customs, and will have only a rudimentary understanding of his language. This, coupled with the loneliness resulting from the forced separation from her family and friends, leads to tensions and conflict, resolved only by the girl returning to The Philippines.

Either way, once the relationship has ended, the girl will almost certainly return to the bars and to prostitution. This is accompanied by an initial period of depression as the girl accepts that she has lost the reasonably comfortable life that comes of having the support of a foreigner and has to revert to the relatively unstable lifestyle of a bargirl. This period is quite short, however, and after a week or so she will once again be content in the disorganised and dissipate way of life, drinking bouts, drug-taking and card-playing, funded by sexual encounters with strangers. Until, of course, she finds herself another foreigner provider.

1 comment

  • Batman
    How sad and how true. Personal experience!

    How sad and how true. Personal experience!

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